


What the Ghost Hunt UK: A Crossover Special

by stardust_in_the_wind



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Everything is Beautiful and Nothing Hurts, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Possibly Pre-Slash, Screenplay/Script Format, Very very generous liberties taken with the haunting details, WTG and GHUK crossover episode, timeline is a bit iffy but all you need to know is that everyone is happy and fine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:34:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27892387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stardust_in_the_wind/pseuds/stardust_in_the_wind
Summary: MELANIE: The only women to visit in Handel’s time were two sopranos, Faustina Bordoni and Francesca Cuzzoni.GEORGIE: I suppose you could say she’s a phantom of the opera.[MELANIE groans]GEORGIE: Come on, that was funny!
Relationships: Georgie Barker/Melanie King
Kudos: 14





	What the Ghost Hunt UK: A Crossover Special

**Author's Note:**

> i would die for wtgfs  
> i am not caught up on s5 please don't spoil it in the comments, much appreciated <3  
> harpsichords are NOT even remotely close to pianos and i think the world needs to know so that’s why they talk about that briefly

[Click]

GEORGIE: Hello, and welcome to this week’s episode of _What the Ghost_. I’m your host, Georgie Barker, and joining me today is Melanie King, from the YouTube show _Ghost Hunt UK_.

MELANIE: Today we’re gonna be covering the ghost of Handel’s house. But since this is a special, we’re going to be recording the entire thing at the house. In fact, we’re inside... right now. 

[A door creaks]

GEORGIE: Spooky. Anyway, some intro: we all know Handel, famous classical composer and all, but no one knows who’s haunting his house. She’s described only as a “startlingly tall woman”-

MELANIE: She’s basically Netflix Tall Girl.

[GEORGIE laughs]

GEORGIE: And she was seen repeatedly when they tried to convert Handel’s house to a museum in 2001.

MELANIE: The only women to visit in Handel’s time were two sopranos, Faustina Bordoni and Francesca Cuzzoni.

GEORGIE: I suppose you could say she’s a phantom of the opera.

[MELANIE groans]

GEORGIE: Come on, that was funny!

[Beat]

MELANIE: Alright, maybe a bit. 

[Door creaks again]

MELANIE: Did you shut the door?

GEORGIE: No, it’s probably just a draft. Or...

MELANIE, in singsong: Oh, opera ghost! Come out, come out wherever you are!

GEORGIE: Well, now she’s probably going to show herself just to give you a singing lesson.

MELANIE: I mean, I wouldn’t say no. 

[Beat]

GEORGIE: Alright, let’s go check out the other rooms. 

[Footsteps, a slight fumbling as the recording device moves]

GEORGIE: We’ve just entered the music room, where Handel wrote all those famous pieces and where the two sopranos probably sang for him.

MELANIE: Also, his harpsichord is a lot smaller than I imagined, like half the size of a piano.

GEORGIE: Well, yeah, they’re two completely different instruments.

MELANIE: But the keys look the same?

[A rustling noise, GEORGIE sneezes]

MELANIE: Bless you.

GEORGIE: Maybe we shouldn’t move that cloth, it’s covered in dust.

MELANIE: I didn’t touch it.

[Pause]

GEORGIE: Are you sure?

MELANIE: Positive.

[Rustling, louder]

MELANIE: Looks like I might be getting that singing lesson after all.

GEORGIE: Hello? Um... opera ghost?

[Silence]

GEORGIE: ... Alright then. This is actually a bit out of character for the ghost of Handel’s house. Earlier sightings began with, quote, the air thickening? At least that’s how one of the museum fundraisers put it.

MELANIE, snickering: The same guy that said he wasn’t sure whether having a ghost would attract or deter customers. 

GEORGIE: I mean, we’re here, aren’t we?

[Beat]

MELANIE: There was an exorcism here. Maybe we can’t see her because of that?

GEORGIE: Yeah, they did call in a priest while they were trying to fix the place up. 

MELANIE: Somehow I don’t think it worked.

GEORGIE: Well, people who saw her all said she was relatively harmless. 

MELANIE: Let’s hope they’re right. Otherwise I might have to use this.

[Beat]

GEORGIE: You do realize a knife won’t work on a ghost?

MELANIE: Never hurts to be prepared! A ghost stabbed _me_ once, you know.

[GEORGIE sighs]

[Faint music]

MELANIE: I’m not imagining that, am I?

[Beat]

GEORGIE: No, you’re not. Listen.

[Sounds of GEORGIE moving the recording device]

[The music is louder, almost drowning out GEORGIE’s voice]

GEORGIE, loudly: This is not a sound effect, it’s actually what we’re hearing right now. The, ah, opera ghost knows how to play the harpsichord. 

[GEORGIE sneezes]

GEORGIE, aside: and doesn’t care that some people have allergies, apparently.

MELANIE: Very inconsiderate of her. 

[The music speeds up]

[Clattering noises]

MELANIE, shouting: Well, this certainly isn’t _thickening of the air_. 

GEORGIE, also shouting: It’s fine, she’s not supposed to be malevolent, right?

MELANIE, shouting but barely audible over the music: Yeah, I guess, but she’s also not supposed to be doing _that_!

[GEORGIE yells something indistinguishable]

[Click]

[Click]

MELANIE: Well, listeners, I guess I’m so bad at singing that I managed to piss off the opera ghost. I feel like that’s a feat in itself. 

[They both laugh]

GEORGIE: You should contact the World Record Committee.

MELANIE: Next thing on my to do list. 

GEORGIE: Well, thank you, Melanie, for joining me today, and thank you, listeners. This has been _What the Ghost._ See you next time! _  
_

[Click]

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed! come say hi in the comments  
> or on [tumblr](https://stardust-in-the-wind.tumblr.com)


End file.
